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BOLA be like, “I saw geese break someone’s arm”

Did you though?

Geese cheat code: they’re bullshitting. Make it clear that you know this and they will fuck off. Run at them screaming “Dinner!” and flap your arms. They fuck off incredibly quickly.

If that doesn’t work, grab the squawky cunt by the neck and practice Olympic hammer throwing. It’s funny, and it won’t give you shit again.

in reply to Sarah Brown

By the way, unless you’re in the water, swans are also bullshitting.

These animals really do NOT want to take on a human. We are bigger, heavier, and stronger and can profoundly fuck them up.

in reply to Sarah Brown

😂but please don't ok?

They're kinda funny and cute when you just leave them be. Had to teach this to one of the kids who _always_ did _exactly_ what you described upon seeing any gathering of birds. Except for the "Dinner" part, unless "AAAAHH" is some language for that.

Even got hired by a dairy farmer to protect the grass. I shit you not.

Thanks for the memories 😁

in reply to Sarah Brown

I believe you on this, but also, this is exactly what someone who wanted to fool people into getting devoured by geese would say. 😉
in reply to Hypolite Petovan

@Hypolite Petovan Best Of Legal Advice on Reddit. One of those “OMG, they did WHAT?” things for amusing bedtime reading.