hey! That's brilliant 😀 may it continue. (I wouldn't be surprised if it's at least a bit of a Thing that telling people how bad it is does sometimes make it a bit better)
@Sion [main] External events are a factor but my reaction to them is way over the top or even exists at all because of the depression. I think the feeling is that I was somehow exaggerating how bad it felt (I wasn’t) to get attention, and now one of guilt for having alarmed or alerted friends now that 48 hours later I’m a bit ok again. And also a sort of fear that everyone will go away again.
Similar feeling regarding my therapist. She’s offered an emergency appointment rather than waiting until September but it doesn’t feel like an emergency today. Saturday evening it definitely did.
I think the potential for emergencies almost certainly counts as an emergency. It's a bit like standing on a plank and it wobbles, I think. If you try again and it doesn't wobble the next time it doesn't mean that it's okay to put all your weight on it, or that it's not worth investigating it as a priority, or that it was silly to alert people to it!
Having been there: just because it's stopped being an emergency now, doesn't mean it's not going to be again before the next time you can see your therapist. Or that next time it's going to go away so quickly. There's no such thing as a false alarm in this sphere, just that sometimes it takes a *lot* of work to figure out what the root cause is.
Have long post brewing about feeling guilty about alarming friends and family, particularly those who understand. Just do it. Some of us are going to be in a place to listen, some aren't, and if we're all honest and transparent about this then those that aren't should just be able to back away from the moment without anyone's guilt, and be there another time.
Eleanor LNR Blair
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Paul Oldham 🏴 💛 🇺🇦 🇵🇸
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Matthew Vernon
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Sion [main]
in reply to Alexandra Lanes • • •If you're at all being triggered by external events, then its going to come in waves.
The question is, do you feel that you were being fraudulently mopey, or that the feeling not so bad is a fraud? Hint: it's neither.
Alexandra Lanes likes this.
Alexandra Lanes
in reply to Sion [main] • •@Sion [main] External events are a factor but my reaction to them is way over the top or even exists at all because of the depression. I think the feeling is that I was somehow exaggerating how bad it felt (I wasn’t) to get attention, and now one of guilt for having alarmed or alerted friends now that 48 hours later I’m a bit ok again. And also a sort of fear that everyone will go away again.
Similar feeling regarding my therapist. She’s offered an emergency appointment rather than waiting until September but it doesn’t feel like an emergency today. Saturday evening it definitely did.
kæt
in reply to Alexandra Lanes • • •Sion [main]
in reply to kæt • • •Alexandra Lanes
in reply to kæt • •Sion [main]
in reply to Alexandra Lanes • • •Having been there: just because it's stopped being an emergency now, doesn't mean it's not going to be again before the next time you can see your therapist. Or that next time it's going to go away so quickly. There's no such thing as a false alarm in this sphere, just that sometimes it takes a *lot* of work to figure out what the root cause is.
Have long post brewing about feeling guilty about alarming friends and family, particularly those who understand. Just do it. Some of us are going to be in a place to listen, some aren't, and if we're all honest and transparent about this then those that aren't should just be able to back away from the moment without anyone's guilt, and be there another time.