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I have often seen the question asked, “why are so many trans women so aggressive/combative”.

And the answer is that we don’t start out being, but we quickly learn that expecting people to be decent human beings towards us because it’s the right thing to do doesn’t work.

It only works if we make it harder to not treat us like human beings than vice versa.

I don’t feel like that’s on us to fix.

in reply to Sarah Brown

In some ways the wrong question, why aren’t the rest of us angrier about this? It’s not that damn complicated. Step one, be nice. Step two, everyone is equal and get the same rights.

I totally get it. I just hope I don’t inadvertently say something stupid (because my brain not great at things said).

in reply to Gen X-Wing

@Breadbin You’ve never given the impression of being about to say stupid things, if that helps?

I mean, I say stupid things all the time!

in reply to Sarah Brown

Oh I am the master at that. I end up expressing myself poorly and people get insanely mad:( It’s easy to get misunderstood. Bonus if I screwed up my English:(

There’s a fine line between asshole and awkward sometimes.

Unknown parent

Gen X-Wing

That’s certainly part of it. But the world is filled with celebrities, leaders, and politicians that peddle the most awful things. That pisses me off. That it’s even seen as a “viewpoint” is bad enough. Facism isn’t an ok nor valid position.

(I’m a bit angry too. Also I do think you bring up a point, and there’s been some bad faith players here:( )

in reply to Sarah Brown

Also, accusations of being "aggressive" is a common tactic against marginalised groups. If you don't respond to hostility and bigotry calmly enough you're blamed for causing it by being "too aggressive".
in reply to Veronica Olsen 🏳️‍🌈🇳🇴🌻

Even the calmest, most passive responses are characterised as aggressive by reactionaries. Simply asking for change is itself seen as aggression by them, even when it clearly isn't.

Kneeling down because you disagree with racism is suddenly painted as provocative.

Scattering confetti at Wimbledon to draw attention to the climate crisis is condemned by government ministers.

in reply to FediThing has moved!

@FediThing Being visible is already aggravating to some, and they project that onto us for just existing let alone daring to be visible.

During the recent election here, I spent two Saturdays on a political stand. Since we are an LGBTQ+ friendly party, a lady came up to me and had to tell me how provocative she thought pride was (it was the weekend before the pride parade). I just responded: "Good. That's the point of Pride." No point arguing.

in reply to Veronica Olsen 🏳️‍🌈🇳🇴🌻

On the flip side, being a calm and articulate bigot gives you a lot of traction with the media, who is always incredibly eager to "both sides" such issues.

A particularly bad case here was one of our country's more public legal experts commending a TERF for using an "indoor voice", more than implying that queer people were not, which she found "tiring". It's an incredible display of privilege, at best.

Unknown parent

Black Mastodon has been talking about this a lot, if you follow them. It's especially bad on Mastodon because of how Federation works where you can kind of get Shadow Federated networks of bad people that can break containment in a way that's visible to some people (if their instances are less thoroughly moderated) but invisible to everyone else.
in reply to Sarah Brown

It's as stupid as asking 'Why is this dinosaur covered in spikes?'
Unknown parent

Naomi
@markusl @breadbin Laws don't protect people who can't afford lawyers.
in reply to Sarah Brown

Alternative hypothesis:

"Why are all these people who are hurting and sore from the wounds their life has given them so sensitive and quick to bark out in pain when poked in old wounds...?"

Because I see a lot of the same "aggression" from chronic pain people and minority groups and I think it comes from ....

Oh gods I'm just restating what you said. Sorry.