Reading r/BestOfRedditUpdates and thanking whatever deities that be relevant for not being cishet because, OMG you guys, a lot of these people are in relationships that are basically wars of attrition.
A lot of people play the Game of Life(1) because they think that's what they're meant to do. Then, halfway around the metaphorical board, something makes them self-examine for the first time, and they realise they don't have to play. But because of the sunk cost fallacy, they can't quit. But if they can make their partner give up instead, then they "win".
And it happens less among people whose sexuality, gender, neurotype, or thing I don't know enough about to name, differ from standard issue.
Because, I think, realising that we are one or more of those things, early in our lives, mean that we learn to self-examine sooner. It does still happen, of course, and heaven knows there are plenty of arseholes in those categories. But it means we can see the issue, more of the time.
This entry was edited (Friday, May 31, 2024, 7:33 PM)
@shinydan @kincaid I think you're right about that. I think it also kind of weans people off identifying themselves with the system (I don't mean "identify" in the modern sense, but as in a kind of lack of resolving of the person and the norm into distinct objects).
Kincaid
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Sarah Brown
in reply to Kincaid • •Shinydan
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •@kincaid
I've thought about this one.
A lot of people play the Game of Life(1) because they think that's what they're meant to do. Then, halfway around the metaphorical board, something makes them self-examine for the first time, and they realise they don't have to play. But because of the sunk cost fallacy, they can't quit. But if they can make their partner give up instead, then they "win".
1) As in Hasbro, not Conway.
Sarah Brown likes this.
Shinydan
in reply to Shinydan • • •And it happens less among people whose sexuality, gender, neurotype, or thing I don't know enough about to name, differ from standard issue.
Because, I think, realising that we are one or more of those things, early in our lives, mean that we learn to self-examine sooner. It does still happen, of course, and heaven knows there are plenty of arseholes in those categories. But it means we can see the issue, more of the time.
Sarah Brown likes this.
kæt
in reply to Shinydan • • •kæt
in reply to Shinydan • • •@shinydan @kincaid Game of Life(1)
1) I was thinking you'd found a man page. That would be very useful, tbh.
Shinydan
in reply to kæt • • •SaraMG, last of her name 🇵🇹
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •like this
Sarah Brown and Alexandra Lanes like this.