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in reply to Sarah Brown

I wish I didn't have to lose my childhood because I had to manage the feelings of mentally ill adults who never learned to manage their own emotions.
in reply to Jackie

I'm lucky in that my spirit was more dormant than actually extinguished.
in reply to Jackie

My og puberty was one of the worst things that happened to me. And it directly coincided with me being emotionally and physically abused by my parents (particularly my birth mother)
in reply to Jackie

@burnoutqueen same. Leaving them all behind permanently and speaking to a therapist helped a lot, but ya. I’d still rather just tell people I’m not human, so they can dismiss me in advance as it’s easier when I know no one is thinking about me.
in reply to Sarah Brown

Just reply to him with a few accounts of trans women getting a laryngectomy. You're just doing it to support his fetish of forcing people to cut their own throats by denying them the ONLY CHANCE they will EVER have to do something about it hormonally. You don't get a second puberty!

"I want to ban anyone from hormones until they're 18." == "I want to cut open people's throats."

in reply to Sarah Brown

I knew at a very young age what would happen if I told anyone. There were several times at a young that I was seconds from coming out. Staying in the closet saved my life as I would find out when I did come out to my parents decades later. What would have happened is something I think about a lot. They still try when given the opportunity and my safety is more important.
in reply to Sarah Brown

let's not discriminate on the grounds of sex, gender, or one's morale. Especially children, to whom we, the society, deny the full power of autonomy to; but appearantly we DO held children accountable for the decisions we deny them autonomy over.
in reply to Sarah Brown

"Let kids be kids" is such a meaningless phrase. The reality is the vast majority of those saying it would never do what it says either. So its a way of spotting hypocrites. The reality is its extremely rare to find any adult, parent or otherwise, who would let a non-adult have any measure of freedom. Thank you for sharing your story.
This entry was edited (1 day ago)
in reply to Sarah Brown

"Let kids be kids" is a dog whistle for a genocide.

If kids can't be trans, then trans adults don't exist.

Because everyone knows that someone doesn't just "become" something else when they hit some magical age.

So that kind of rhetoric is just a friendly-sounding way to say "I support genocide."

in reply to Sarah Brown

Let trans kids be trans kids.

Let trans kids be happy kids.

Let trans kids be alive kids.

Give them trans healthcare.

:blobcathuggies:

in reply to Sarah Brown

people who say "let kids be kids" have forgotten what it was like to be a kid. they mean "let kids be like in The Famous Five" or, worse, "let kids be invisible to me".
in reply to Fish Id Wardrobe ⁂

@fishidwardrobe Oof... The Famous Five... and who did I identify most with - George. The tomboy. Especially how in the first books she was forced into skirts.

I knew there were lots of signs. But that's one I hadn't noticed before. And it's a big one.

in reply to Sarah Brown

I ask this to learn, not to pass judgement.

How did you know at age 5 that your mental sex did not match physical one? Because you prefered playing with dolls with other girls instead of Tonka trucks with other boys? (pardon the cliché, I want to learn)

While with hindsight, you can confidently state the signs that were there at 5 ended up being long term, but when you were 5, would you have known this "issue" was to be permanent as opposed to just a passing phase of growing up?

in reply to Jean-François Mezei

@jfmezei
How did you know your "mental sex" matched your "physical sex" at age 5?

I assume the way you were being socialized, the nicknames you were given, the clothing you were provided, the behavior that was encouraged, the colors you were permitted to like, the stuffed animals you had, the toys you were given all matched who you thought you were.

From birth, you are immediately are inundated with "girls should be like this; boys should be like that". It's everywhere, down to the color your room is painted and whether or not they put a bow in your first whispy hairs.

As soon as you can see boys and girls are treated differently, you can tell which side you'd rather be on. If it matches, you'll never notice. If it doesn't match, then you have gender dysphoria.

in reply to J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF:

@jrdepriest Fair enough. But aren't there many who act different as kids (girls who are tom boys for instance) but once puberty/hormones kick in, end up naturally growing into their body's sex?

My curiosity is about how/when one knows this is your permanent self identity vs just passing phase between kid and finishing puberty.

Is there a way to determine this when someone is just 5 ?
Not opposed to someone being who they want to be. Just curious when this can be determined

in reply to Jean-François Mezei

@jfmezei
My wife was a tomboy. She played with Tonka trucks in her sandbox and the last time she wore makeup or a dress was almost thirty years ago at our wedding.

She never once thought about being a boy.

You cannot understand gender dysphoria if you've never felt it. You don't have to understand it. Just believe people when they tell you.

She doesn't understand gender dysphoria, either. But she loves me and she knows how much happier I am since I transitioned.

in reply to J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF:

@jrdepriest Have 0 problem with adults deciding for themselves. People should be free to be who they want to be. That is what freedom and liberty is all about.

Since original was about issue of transitioning as a kid, my question is how one can know this is permanent disphoria as a kid vs just a temporary phase of life.

Can physically male kid wear pink and play with girls and wait till later for formal transition? (and with parent's support)

in reply to Jean-François Mezei

in reply to J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF:

@jrdepriest Another question: until person reaches 18, the parents are legally in charge, right?

Between childhood and onset of puberty, would there need to be some psychologist/psychiatrist to determine the child does have disphoria, and then guide parents on how to properly deal/decide for child?

If puberty blockers only postpone need for actual treatment, at what age must THE decision be made for hormonal treatments?
Correct to assume surgery can wait till after 18?

in reply to Jean-François Mezei

in reply to Jean-François Mezei

@Jean-François Mezei No. I played with Lego and climbed trees. Nothing about what I wanted to play with.

I just knew. It’s that simple. I knew I needed to be a girl.

in reply to Sarah Brown

I'm sorry that was your experience. The best version I know was a coworker's grandchild. They told their parents after junior kindergarten they believed they were really a girl. Over the summer everyone got their shit together and the child went back to senior kindergarten as a girl. Their classmates at school got over the switch in about ten minutes and they've been a happy, contented kid ever since. The way it should be.
in reply to Sarah Brown

Just relate to this so much. Never could quite put it into words. So thank you. My family were not so abusive nor were they violent but the shame. And guilt. I have recently been thinking about the lack of a childhood - in spite of best intentions. I have found I have almost no memories from childhood. My partner in spite of a very abusive upbringing has far more childhood memories. "best intentions" is my invention and not appropriate. Yet I still call their denial of my existence that. Thank you for sharing.
in reply to Sarah Brown

You're heard. This was well-said.

I'm doing my best to bring my light back out, too. 💜​

in reply to Sarah Brown

🫂
I have no idea if I knew so young because I have almost no memories from before 10-11, I'm sure that meant I had great fun /s 🙃
This entry was edited (8 hours ago)