Just seen someone saying they support bans on trans healthcare for under 18s because “let kids be kids”.
By the time I hit puberty, I had KNOWN for a decade.
I also knew that telling anyone would be profoundly dangerous.
So I hid who I was and, am almost grateful that the neurodivergence gave the other kids something else to latch on to. They were so busy calling me a “mong” that they didn’t notice I was trans.
Because that might have got me murdered.
Or pushed me into a position where I felt I had no options other than the same end result.
So I hid it.
And I hid it really well.
And one of the things that happens when a 5 year old child is terrified of their parents, or their families, or the school bullies finding out who they really are is that they end up traumatised.
A 5 year old child. Traumatised and ashamed.
Ashamed because adults openly talked about them.
Or people like them.
And what they said was horrific. What they said made it very clear that they would regard their own kids as subhuman monsters if they ever found out.
So we hid. And an important part of ourselves died in childhood. A light that should have shone, went out.
I’ve tried my best to rekindle it.
I’ve managed somewhat but it will never be right. Not really. I’ve made peace with that.
“Let kids be kids”. Trans kids like me never got to be.
Because of people who say things like that.
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Nikkileah 🎮🚄🏳️⚧️🇬🇧
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Nikkileah 🎮🚄🏳️⚧️🇬🇧
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Sarah Brown likes this.
Sarah Brown
in reply to Nikkileah 🎮🚄🏳️⚧️🇬🇧 • •Daniel Reeders
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Sarah Brown likes this.
Jackie
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Sarah Brown likes this.
Jackie
in reply to Jackie • • •Sarah Brown likes this.
Jackie
in reply to Jackie • • •Netraven
in reply to Jackie • • •Cy
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Just reply to him with a few accounts of trans women getting a laryngectomy. You're just doing it to support his fetish of forcing people to cut their own throats by denying them the ONLY CHANCE they will EVER have to do something about it hormonally. You don't get a second puberty!
"I want to ban anyone from hormones until they're 18." == "I want to cut open people's throats."
diana 🏳️⚧️🦋🌱
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Feike🇪🇺🇳🇱🚫👑no Dictators
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Feral Fury 🏴☠️ 🏳️🌈 🫂🔞
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Sarah Brown likes this.
ChloChloaca
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •"Let kids be kids" is a dog whistle for a genocide.
If kids can't be trans, then trans adults don't exist.
Because everyone knows that someone doesn't just "become" something else when they hit some magical age.
So that kind of rhetoric is just a friendly-sounding way to say "I support genocide."
GreenSkyOverMe (Monika)
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Let trans kids be trans kids.
Let trans kids be happy kids.
Let trans kids be alive kids.
Give them trans healthcare.
Fish Id Wardrobe ⁂
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Briala
in reply to Fish Id Wardrobe ⁂ • • •@fishidwardrobe Oof... The Famous Five... and who did I identify most with - George. The tomboy. Especially how in the first books she was forced into skirts.
I knew there were lots of signs. But that's one I hadn't noticed before. And it's a big one.
Kara Goldfinch
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Sarah Brown likes this.
Nate
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •@bekit
Verđandi K Soldusty
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Jean-François Mezei
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •I ask this to learn, not to pass judgement.
How did you know at age 5 that your mental sex did not match physical one? Because you prefered playing with dolls with other girls instead of Tonka trucks with other boys? (pardon the cliché, I want to learn)
While with hindsight, you can confidently state the signs that were there at 5 ended up being long term, but when you were 5, would you have known this "issue" was to be permanent as opposed to just a passing phase of growing up?
J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF:
in reply to Jean-François Mezei • • •@jfmezei
How did you know your "mental sex" matched your "physical sex" at age 5?
I assume the way you were being socialized, the nicknames you were given, the clothing you were provided, the behavior that was encouraged, the colors you were permitted to like, the stuffed animals you had, the toys you were given all matched who you thought you were.
From birth, you are immediately are inundated with "girls should be like this; boys should be like that". It's everywhere, down to the color your room is painted and whether or not they put a bow in your first whispy hairs.
As soon as you can see boys and girls are treated differently, you can tell which side you'd rather be on. If it matches, you'll never notice. If it doesn't match, then you have gender dysphoria.
Jean-François Mezei
in reply to J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF: • • •@jrdepriest Fair enough. But aren't there many who act different as kids (girls who are tom boys for instance) but once puberty/hormones kick in, end up naturally growing into their body's sex?
My curiosity is about how/when one knows this is your permanent self identity vs just passing phase between kid and finishing puberty.
Is there a way to determine this when someone is just 5 ?
Not opposed to someone being who they want to be. Just curious when this can be determined
J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF:
in reply to Jean-François Mezei • • •@jfmezei
My wife was a tomboy. She played with Tonka trucks in her sandbox and the last time she wore makeup or a dress was almost thirty years ago at our wedding.
She never once thought about being a boy.
You cannot understand gender dysphoria if you've never felt it. You don't have to understand it. Just believe people when they tell you.
She doesn't understand gender dysphoria, either. But she loves me and she knows how much happier I am since I transitioned.
Sarah Brown likes this.
Jean-François Mezei
in reply to J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF: • • •@jrdepriest Have 0 problem with adults deciding for themselves. People should be free to be who they want to be. That is what freedom and liberty is all about.
Since original was about issue of transitioning as a kid, my question is how one can know this is permanent disphoria as a kid vs just a temporary phase of life.
Can physically male kid wear pink and play with girls and wait till later for formal transition? (and with parent's support)
Sarah Brown
in reply to Jean-François Mezei • •J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF:
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •@jfmezei
J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF:
in reply to Jean-François Mezei • • •@jfmezei
Gender dysphoria in children exists. Doctors and scientists who went to school to learn how to study this kind of thing agree that it exists. You do not understand it. That is fine, that is fine. You do not have to.
Do you think they do gender reassignment surgeries on children? That's conservative fear mongering. The only treatments for kids are social transitioning and, eventually, puberty blockers. Puberty blockers keep the body from undergoing any permanent changes so they can figure out what they want to do. Stop the blockers and they have the puberty their in-built organs pump out. Start HRT and they have the other puberty.
What if a child assigned female at birth asks to be called "he" for six months and then changes her mind? So what? They were allowed to explore the option. Childhood should be a time when kids are not afraid to experiment and when their parents and family support them. For example, in many households, a little boy asking to be a
... show more@jfmezei
Gender dysphoria in children exists. Doctors and scientists who went to school to learn how to study this kind of thing agree that it exists. You do not understand it. That is fine, that is fine. You do not have to.
Do you think they do gender reassignment surgeries on children? That's conservative fear mongering. The only treatments for kids are social transitioning and, eventually, puberty blockers. Puberty blockers keep the body from undergoing any permanent changes so they can figure out what they want to do. Stop the blockers and they have the puberty their in-built organs pump out. Start HRT and they have the other puberty.
What if a child assigned female at birth asks to be called "he" for six months and then changes her mind? So what? They were allowed to explore the option. Childhood should be a time when kids are not afraid to experiment and when their parents and family support them. For example, in many households, a little boy asking to be a princess for Halloween will get them beaten, punished. They don't have the freedom to find out if it's "just a phase" (which is such a dogwhistle).
In an ideal world, even if it is just temporary, they still get to try it out. No harm done.
Jean-François Mezei
in reply to J. R. DePriest :EA DATA. SF: • • •@jrdepriest Another question: until person reaches 18, the parents are legally in charge, right?
Between childhood and onset of puberty, would there need to be some psychologist/psychiatrist to determine the child does have disphoria, and then guide parents on how to properly deal/decide for child?
If puberty blockers only postpone need for actual treatment, at what age must THE decision be made for hormonal treatments?
Correct to assume surgery can wait till after 18?
Sarah Brown
in reply to Jean-François Mezei • •@Jean-François Mezei No. I played with Lego and climbed trees. Nothing about what I wanted to play with.
I just knew. It’s that simple. I knew I needed to be a girl.
The Witch of Crow Briar
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Karen D 🇨🇦
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Starryeyesswitched
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Sarah Brown likes this.
Daisy
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Erosdiscordia
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •You're heard. This was well-said.
I'm doing my best to bring my light back out, too. 💜
Sasailu der Monddelphin ;o*
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •Lou 🏳️⚧️
in reply to Sarah Brown • • •I have no idea if I knew so young because I have almost no memories from before 10-11, I'm sure that meant I had great fun /s 🙃