From Ambrose Bierce’s “Devil’s Dictionary” of 1911:

Respirator, n. An apparatus fitted over the nose and mouth of an inhabitant of London, whereby to filter the visible universe in its passage to the lungs.

Plus ça change…

If you know French, I think it can help disambiguate some prepositions in Portuguese:

Por is par and para is pour.

The railway south of Cambridge splits just south of the city, with one line heading to Liverpool Street and one, the faster shorter route, to Kings Cross or St Pancras. Ever since I learned the point where they split is called “Shepreth Branch Junction” I’ve taken delight in saying “we’re taking the Shepreth branch” as if this is some forgotten branch line bywater of the network rather than the main route to London. Conjuring the romantic from the mundane just from a bit of railway geekery. Adlestrop, or the slow train.

Shepreth itself is a bit of a bywater. Express trains, like this one, skip it and its neighbours Foxton and Meldreth, so if you want to partake of their delights — a safari park! A path through a field! Tech startups that couldn’t afford Cambridge! — you’ll need to take the actual slow train.

Oh, Google.

You wanted:

Commission Regulation (EU) No 330/2010 of 20 April 2010 on the application of Article 101(3) of the Treaty on the Functioning of the European Union.

You got:

0.16417910447

Apropos of having just dealt with an irritating personal problem of the feminine nature, I find myself thinking back to the start of The Last Of Us.

Guys, did you even think to TRY Fluconazole?

As a child, I grew up speaking the East Midlands dialect of English.

But I was led to believe that were I to “get on in life”, I would need to speak Standard Southern British English.

As I believed this, I willingly embraced it and now I mostly do speak SSBE.

But I’m somewhat bitter about needing to, even if I did willingly embrace it at the time because, as I was taught, I thought my own dialect was “unsophisticated”.

It wasn’t; it was just different, but in the 70s and 80s even local celebrities who made it big on the national stage were encouraged to drift linguistically towards London, and if they didn’t, that acted as a barrier.

It’s less the case now, but with the benefit of hindsight I do feel a bit resentful about it.

As times have changed, and as I don’t feel that I have anything to prove, I increasingly find myself drifting back towards the way I used to speak as a child.

Ar ar ar ar ar ar ar arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Me hearties

It appears that there may be an issue with Google Chrome not starting for some users of Mac OS Sequoia.

I have found a workaround. In the Finder, open the Applications folder, locate Chrome, drag it to the bin, then empty the bin.

Fixed

Been trying to contact a shipwright, ANY shipwright, in France, to help with my annual boat maintenance and, is it a French thing that NOBODY EVER FUCKING ANSWERS THEIR FUCKING EMAIL?

Do not make me fucking phone you. I am neurodivergent and I don't speak French.

Just replaced my old Apple TV 4K with the newer model that is also a Thread border router. I now have two: the HomePod Mini (WiFi) and the Apple TV (Ethernet).

And OMG, Thread is so much faster & more reliable!

Slightly embarrassing moment at work yesterday. There's been a bit of a bug going round various people in the office, so when a coworker walked in saying "ooh, I'm feeling a bit grotty today" I moved to jokingly make the sign of the cross to ward off the plague before stopping myself because I remembered he's Muslim.

I'm atheist, but societal Christian defaultism can always rear its head!

Upgraded to iOS 18?

Check the calendar month view our. Try pinch zooming. Thank me later.

Been thinking about Sarah’s history of English royalty since William t he Conquerer. Let me know if I left anything important out:

Succession crisis -> civil war.

Civil war resolved, negotiated succession.

Descendant of negotiated successor pisses everyone off -> civil war.

Descendant forced to accept terms.

Stability for a bit while they’re busy fighting other people.

Succession crisis -> civil war.

Civil war resolved violently.

Succession crisis (religion). Civil war narrowly averted.

Dynasty goes extinct. Succession negotiated.

Descendant of negotiated successor pisses everyone off -> civil war.

Civil war resolved through decapitation.

Succession crisis. Civil war averted via negotiated succession.

Succession crisis -> civil war fizzles

Dynasty goes extinct (yes, Charlie, it did. Shut up)

Parliament is finally utterly fucking sick of this lot starting civil wars, installs German puppets. The end.

You’re scared we’re going to beat you at sports.

We’re scared you’re going to beat us to death.

We are not the same.

BREAKING! In a move that the Liberal Democrat party hopes will finally deal with their transphobe problem, they have handed the Sudetenland to the transphobes.

In exchange, the transphobes pinky promised that they won’t demand any further concessions, “you know, for a bit anyway”.